Over the past few weeks, we have had stories shared with us about many of the girls in both the protection and short stay homes as to why they were in need of MCCSS's services. Undoubtedly, the most common trend among all the cases besides poverty, and in a way this very well might have to do with poverty, is love affairs. Time and time again I have heard of girls who run away from home for a man they were in love with and were then either sold into trafficking, beaten, or abandoned. There are even some who are sneaking around trying to maintain these "relationships" with men who they believe love them. A lot of the time it it is with older men who might even be married with families of their own, and these girls are not even 16.
In some of the cases, the child was sent away from the family by their request or a court order to keep these love affairs from continuing. Still they happen, the men find them, but no legal action can be taken against the men. Isabel shared with us her frustration on the matter where she wants to provide these girls with the opportunity to work and care for themselves, but these men come into their stores and convince to do things without the knowledge of MCCSS (providing them with cell phones, meeting them at other times, running away, etc.). She genuinely wants to trust these girls but how can she when they are in constant danger of manipulation the moment they leave the home.
For me I'm angered at the slanted justice. Why is it that the girls are being punished, forced to leave their homes and families, stripped of opportunities to work where thy don't have to worry about be harassed? Why not target the men who are actually perpetuating this activity by preying on these innocent girls who are 20 years younger?
I become infuriated by the lack of justice, but remember what Isabel shared with us interns. "You can not come into an Indian organization to judge and evaluate with Western eyes." It's a completely different world over here with different standards and customs to work with and against. Where I might feel that instead of just dealing with the status quo of the legal system, MCCSS should be doing more to change it, which would in return benefit the girls even more. But it's not just a legal system their up against, its an entire country and social structure's view on women.
When standing in line just the other day at a store, another intern and I were confronted with this drastic contrast of views on women. I was waiting for a women and her kids to finish paying so I could then have my turn at the checkout counter when a man blew past me and Debbie, stopping beside me, and behind this woman. The moment she gathered her last item from the counter, he reached over and laid down his purchases. I looked back at Debbie, her face just as astonished. Boiling. In America, I wouldn't have thought twice about letting this man know exactly how I felt. I looked at the other lines of which he could've jumped in, all of them were shorter, one maybe two people. However, there were only men in these lines.
Women are second class citizens here. Double standards exist everywhere to match this mindset. These girls have committed no crime at all except for the desire to be with someone who tells them they're loved and beautiful. These men tell them how much they love them, how they are much better and prettier than their wives, how their family and friends disapprove only because they're jealous. It's sick. These girls are so full of love and ready to give it away although a lot of them have spent a majority of their lives in complete neglect and absence of love.
I find it ironic how the ones who appear to have the most overflowing heart, ready to share their love and every bit of it with the first one who comes along, are the ones who seem to have received it the least. And despite how often they are hurt and betrayed, they are so resilient and quick to trust another.
I grew up everyday of my life being told I was beautiful, loved, a princess, and yet one minor betrayal is enough to prevent me from loving another again, despite the over abundance of pure genuine love I have received. I in way envy their strong resilient hearts, able to endure the harshest blows and still believe in beauty. But here I realize I envy through Western eyes. Strength and weakness are blurred with different vantage points. At times I believe my heart is wounded and weak, but I look and see that my heart and love for people is why I'm here. The overabundance that I received my entire life is finally able to overflow into the hearts of these girls who have lacked this amazing genuine love. They might be toughened from hardship, and I might be softened from spoiling. But though whatever lens you chose to view it, it is undeniable the love that is being shared through all of us.
In a way, our pasts and scarred hearts are teaching the others how to love in a new way, not to make the same mistakes, but also how to recognize purely reciprocated love. It's not just me giving them something. Without their knowledge they are in return giving me a lesson on love. So despite governments, cultures and the past, love remains the same across all barriers and becomes what truly matters.
In some of the cases, the child was sent away from the family by their request or a court order to keep these love affairs from continuing. Still they happen, the men find them, but no legal action can be taken against the men. Isabel shared with us her frustration on the matter where she wants to provide these girls with the opportunity to work and care for themselves, but these men come into their stores and convince to do things without the knowledge of MCCSS (providing them with cell phones, meeting them at other times, running away, etc.). She genuinely wants to trust these girls but how can she when they are in constant danger of manipulation the moment they leave the home.
For me I'm angered at the slanted justice. Why is it that the girls are being punished, forced to leave their homes and families, stripped of opportunities to work where thy don't have to worry about be harassed? Why not target the men who are actually perpetuating this activity by preying on these innocent girls who are 20 years younger?
I become infuriated by the lack of justice, but remember what Isabel shared with us interns. "You can not come into an Indian organization to judge and evaluate with Western eyes." It's a completely different world over here with different standards and customs to work with and against. Where I might feel that instead of just dealing with the status quo of the legal system, MCCSS should be doing more to change it, which would in return benefit the girls even more. But it's not just a legal system their up against, its an entire country and social structure's view on women.
When standing in line just the other day at a store, another intern and I were confronted with this drastic contrast of views on women. I was waiting for a women and her kids to finish paying so I could then have my turn at the checkout counter when a man blew past me and Debbie, stopping beside me, and behind this woman. The moment she gathered her last item from the counter, he reached over and laid down his purchases. I looked back at Debbie, her face just as astonished. Boiling. In America, I wouldn't have thought twice about letting this man know exactly how I felt. I looked at the other lines of which he could've jumped in, all of them were shorter, one maybe two people. However, there were only men in these lines.
Women are second class citizens here. Double standards exist everywhere to match this mindset. These girls have committed no crime at all except for the desire to be with someone who tells them they're loved and beautiful. These men tell them how much they love them, how they are much better and prettier than their wives, how their family and friends disapprove only because they're jealous. It's sick. These girls are so full of love and ready to give it away although a lot of them have spent a majority of their lives in complete neglect and absence of love.
I find it ironic how the ones who appear to have the most overflowing heart, ready to share their love and every bit of it with the first one who comes along, are the ones who seem to have received it the least. And despite how often they are hurt and betrayed, they are so resilient and quick to trust another.
I grew up everyday of my life being told I was beautiful, loved, a princess, and yet one minor betrayal is enough to prevent me from loving another again, despite the over abundance of pure genuine love I have received. I in way envy their strong resilient hearts, able to endure the harshest blows and still believe in beauty. But here I realize I envy through Western eyes. Strength and weakness are blurred with different vantage points. At times I believe my heart is wounded and weak, but I look and see that my heart and love for people is why I'm here. The overabundance that I received my entire life is finally able to overflow into the hearts of these girls who have lacked this amazing genuine love. They might be toughened from hardship, and I might be softened from spoiling. But though whatever lens you chose to view it, it is undeniable the love that is being shared through all of us.
In a way, our pasts and scarred hearts are teaching the others how to love in a new way, not to make the same mistakes, but also how to recognize purely reciprocated love. It's not just me giving them something. Without their knowledge they are in return giving me a lesson on love. So despite governments, cultures and the past, love remains the same across all barriers and becomes what truly matters.
2 comments:
Beautiful, Jessi. This really helped me (and I'm sure others) to understand further into these girls' lives, to understand "why". We all know "what" is going on, but your words from actually being there with them make us fully understand.
You will never think the same way about anything. This experience is going to totally change you into a new "beautiful" person, that views the world through different lenses. So much of it I'm sure others will never truly understand. Life's expereiences are amazing.
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